Being Listened to Gives us Space to Think.

I really haven't known what I've wanted to say for nearly the whole of lockdown. Every time I have thought I might have something I might like to share, the following week has turned my head and I've felt entirely different, leaving me feeling like a complete fraud for the previous week's mood. At one … Continue reading Being Listened to Gives us Space to Think.

Turning “I hate you!” around.

“Go away! I hate you!” Never a nice thing to hear.  Especially screamed. Loudly. In a public place. Sometimes I think my life can be split into before Hand in Hand Parenting, and after.  Like driving to new locations using an unwieldy paper map and then discovering satellite navigation. Before I learnt some good information … Continue reading Turning “I hate you!” around.

Tears and Tantrums

“I want the Walkie Talkie!” The cry was a heart-broken plea, at a deafening volume. My 4-year-old mindee was flat out on the floor beside me, where I had sat down to explain it was time to tidy up before I took her home.  She was sad, cross, indignant, and desperate for the toy. She … Continue reading Tears and Tantrums

Rewards of Listening to Feelings

Christmas has not been what we had thought it might be. Sitting in front of the TV, watching the UK Prime minster telling us that more restrictions were needed, was odd. Odd in that it’s become a thing we do now. Watch Boris make Announcements.  Like we’re about to go to war. The surreal-ness is … Continue reading Rewards of Listening to Feelings

Playing Our Way Out of Sibling Rivalry

Having two boys is great, wonderful. And simultaneously, one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. As a childminder I look after 3 toddlers every day, but having two of my own children feels like working at a different level. Maybe because child care and parenting are very different jobs. It's the arguments, the competitiveness, … Continue reading Playing Our Way Out of Sibling Rivalry

But I read it in a book! Why can’t I parent like I want to?

You’ve read it and it made sense, the image it conjured up is exactly what you were aiming for, the tips sound right up your street, suited your ethics, the culture you want to adopt in your own family. Bam! You’ve found it, sorted! Next time you have a tricky situation with your child, you … Continue reading But I read it in a book! Why can’t I parent like I want to?

Listening to Emotions Can Be Hard.

My boys cry. Not that much of a big deal, maybe. Except that for a long time I tried to make it stop. At times, I down right didn’t allow it. It's not nice to admit but it was the effect it sometimes had on me. Physically. Some crying used to pierce my ears, like … Continue reading Listening to Emotions Can Be Hard.

Connecting With Kids: from laughter to lightness

“Mum, I think Charlie must have had a really big cry!” As my 7-year-old, Charlie and myself had all been together in the garden for the past 20 minutes and Charlie HADN’T cried I was a bit confused. “What do you mean Jimmy?” “Well, Charlie seems all…light.” “Light?” Oddly, I do sometimes use that phrase … Continue reading Connecting With Kids: from laughter to lightness

Why can’t I Just…Stop…Nagging?

Sometimes you have no idea why the words are coming out of your mouth. Sometimes your brain is actively trying to STOP the words coming out. Sometimes you hear them as if someone else is saying them. You know its not helpful, might even be unhelpful, but you still can’t stop your lips and tongue … Continue reading Why can’t I Just…Stop…Nagging?

Parenting Judgement

It was like watching Goggle Box. I was viewing the scene from the other side of the street, a stream of judgemental critique flowing through my mind. A young mum was pushing a pram with a toddler trailing behind her, wailing. The Mum was looking ahead, seemingly deaf to the noises her child was making. … Continue reading Parenting Judgement